A belated Valentine's treat.

This gave me a good laugh.



I do believe the piano scenes are filmed in an LDS cultural hall.

Can't say I blame them...

I never was any good at math. Sibbie sent me these. And to her I say, "Did you even see the ode? If you're not going to post, I will."

Every car I've ever owned.

I use the word "owned" loosely here. I'm including any car that was mine to drive pretty much exclusively whether I actually bought it or not.

#1 - a white 1975 Toyota Starlet. It was the first car I ever crashed. The first time I drove it, I plowed it into our camping trailer and dented the bumper. It was a stick shift, if that's any excuse. I learned to drive with it in my early teens and drove it for about a year after I got my license. While I was an exchange student in Europe, my dad accidentally broke the back windshield and instead of repairing it, he sold the car for $100.#2 - a gold 1979 Volkswagen Scirocco. I remember dad giving the guy $600 cash for it. It had no shocks and whenever I hit a pothole, it would jump to the right about 3 feet. It was quite peppy, and I remember giving a friend a run for his money when I raced him in his peach El Camino.

#3 - a chocolate brown 1980's Chevy Suburban. This picture is the closest I could find, but the one I drove was much sweeter. I once lost control of it and drove it over my neighbor's flower garden. I'd like to say it was winter and the roads were slick, but I think it was July.#4 - a red 1980 Datsun F10. It didn't have a key so I couldn't lock it, and it was wired so that you could start it with any straight edge. I kept a screwdriver on hand and if I couldn't find that, I usually used my sunglasses. I remember trying to use my fingernail once or twice but that never worked.

#5 - a white 1989 Chevy Corsica. The speedometer only went to 80 - if you drove any faster, the needle pointed to Park. The odometer read 80,000 miles. It had been broken for 5 years before I bought the car.

#6 - a red 1990 Mazda 323. It actually looked more like this one, without the damage. Until the end, when I totalled it.

#7 - a teal 1996 Geo Metro. Funny story. And a not-so-funny story. I asked my dad to find a car within my budget for me while I was at school in Utah. One day my roommates were joking that he could possibly get something I absolutely hated and asked "What's the worst case scenario?" My answer: "A teal Geo Metro." I should've just been grateful he was doing all the leg work for me, but I couldn't help but notice the bittersweet irony when that's exactly what he found.

Now, the not-so-funny story. This is what the Geo looked like after it stopped rolling:

#8 - a green 1994 Mazda 626. When I sold it, it was primer gray due to all of its paint peeling off.

#9 - a 2003 gray Volkswagen Passat. This one has shocks.The last two, I inherited through marriage.

#10 - a gold 1990 Volvo 240 DL. We dated in this car. Col proposed to me out of its hood.

#11 - a silver 1998 Volvo S-70. Col, it looks like our front passenger side tire is a little low.
*Some years are my best guess since all I could get out of my dad was "Early 70's."

The ostrich is my favorite.

The rest of them are here.

Afternoon Snack

The most delicious box of Valentine's chocolates I have ever seen.

Do you remember that Office Valentine's episode where all these flowers keep coming in and none of them are for Pam? That's me today. Which is fine, because I don't care that much about flowers and every time flowers came in for someone I wasn't ever jealous. Then I went to Robyn's for lunch and saw the box of chocolates Cameron gave her for V-Day. Holy deliciousness. None of those nasty fruit-filled ones - only good ones. This picture here? It doesn't even do it justice.

This isn't a hidden message that I want to be given a box of chocolates. It's just a heads up to Robyn and Cameron that I'm going to be visiting a lot this week.

Great moments in solicitor history.

Please be advised:

If you call me after 3 p.m. and say, "Good morning," I will hang up on you. Especially if you continue with "I'd like to speak to Miss Albert Sanders."

If you call me and say, "May I speak to the person in charge of..." no matter what you say next, I will hang up on you.

If you call me and say, "Hello Mr. Audrey Carter" I will hang up on you.

If you pronounce Graham "Gray Ham", if you say you are with Qwest, if you say you just have a short survey, if there is a long pause before you begin talking, or if you ask who maintenances my copy machine, believe me when I say that I will definitely hang up on you.

Move over, Larry Boy. Make room for Jot.

Though I've never actually seen a Veggie Tales cartoon, I know from talking to Robyn that they teach Bible stories, albeit somewhat obscured (i.e. Rack, Shack & Benny at the Nezzer chocolate factory).

I saw this cartoon on daddytypes. Unfortunately, the competition between the two isn't exactly lively, as Larry Boy is still alive and well while little Jot had his heyday in the 70's. Looks like Larry Boy reigns supreme. For now.

Adding to the hype.

When I first heard about the upcoming comedy Blades of Glory, I was pretty excited, but a little worried since Will Ferrell can ruin a good comedy if he tries hard enough. Then I saw these pictures on Jenna Fischer's blog. Add GOB, Amy Poehler, and Jenna Fischer to John Heder & Will Ferrell, and how can it not be hilarious?

Time for a haircut

Goodbye, Anna Nicole.

She lived weird, she died weird. Quite a legacy she's left behind.

Connecting with her Idaho roots.

Addie loves potatoes. You can tell by how disappointed she is when a piece falls on the floor.

The Dishonest Bellboy

Three people check into a hotel. They pay $30 to the manager and go to their room. The manager suddenly remembers that the room rate is $25 and gives $5 to the bellboy to return to the people. On the way to the room the bellboy reasons that $5 would be difficult to share among three people so he pockets $2 and gives $1 to each person. Now each person paid $10 and got back $1. So they paid $9 each, totalling $27. The bellboy has $2, totalling $29. Where is the missing $1?

Finger Painting

This rivals the dot game and hangman for things to do during a high councilman talk.

Squatters

My first run-in with a squatter was a couple of years ago when Col and I were first married and looking for a house. Cameron, our realtor, was showing us everything in our price range. Our visit to one condo complex in Scottsdale provided quite a unique experience. Cameron unlocked the door of the empty, available condo, and pushed it open. It was completely dark inside, so we were surprised to hear a shout and see a man dressed only in his skivvies jump out of the darkened room at us and slam the door shut.

This morning a coworker from Mesa told us about squatters that have built a ramshackle shelter out of a tarp and some wood on city land near her property. They are using a construction sign as a door. She called it in and a police officer checked it out. When she heard back, she found out that he had arrested one of the men, but the other 2 were allowed to remain. She called again and was told that the city is not able to remove homeless people from city land, as it would be a violation of their rights. Her question is, what about her rights as a taxpayer?

Regardless of who or what is right on this issue, one thing is certain. Squatters scare the crap out of me.

The review I would've written.

Col and I saw the movie The Fountain last night. It was not what I expected. I really liked it, but it's not the kind of movie you can recommend because there's a chance that people will think "Aubrey liked this?!" before they get fed up and walk out, like the guy sitting behind me in the theater who muttered "This is stupid. I don't get it" until he left about 20 minutes into the film.

I wanted to find out a few opinions about it, and I stumbled across this review, which I think perfectly describes how I felt about the movie. I'm definitely not going to guarantee you'll like it, but I did.