Halloween Costume #2

Today at work we all dressed up as my boss. She's the one front & center. It was really funny. She told several of us "You look so nice today! Look at you all dressed up!" before realizing we'd all dressed up as her.



Probably the only time in my life I'll ever wear ribbon in my hair. And pearls. And black tights.

The only thing Col is scared of

I'm an Idaho girl at heart.

Some people might look at these pictures and feel sorry for the animals, or disgusted at hunting in general. Others might have no problem with hunting, but just don't see the appeal.

I look at these pictures and wish I could've gone with my brother, dad and uncle on this trip even though it's always been a guys only no-girls-allowed trip. I guess I'm actually an Idaho boy at heart.

It's all downhill from here.

I don't know if we'll ever come up with a better idea for a Halloween costume than we had this year as Paul Bunyan and Babe the Blue Ox. We should probably quit while we're ahead. That way I'd never have to wear face paint again. As much as I like no one being able to recognize me, getting that blue off my face was no fun.

Would you like iced tea with your roast?

Today the president of the company for which I work received a prestigious award and I attended the award luncheon. They roasted him which was great fun. My only complaint was that the only beverage they served was iced tea. Does everyone drink iced tea? I can tell you that the answer to that is no, because I do not drink iced tea. I also happen to know a few others who don't drink iced tea, so I ask you why? Why would that automatically be the drink they serve? At least they gave me a glass of water or I would have been Parched with a capital P.

P.S. Those little chocolate raspberry cakes you can see in the photo were Divine with a capital D.

Who needs to crawl when you've got moves like these?

She may not be able to crawl yet, but she can roll, scoot, shimmy, slide, and roll some more to get where she wants to be. In this picture she is strategically inching underneath the entertainment center. You can tell she's none too pleased to be caught in the act.

All this wiggling and maneuvering means she ends up sleeping in positions such as this one:

Walmart vs. Taco Bell: which one of you do I hate more?

As we were leaving town Friday evening, we realized we had not packed swim diapers. These were going to be a necessity since we were pretty much going to live at the beach for the next few days. We knew we had to stop, because unlike fireworks, churros, camerones, curios, and cheap knock-off prescription drugs, swim diapers aren't one of those things that you know you can find cheap on every corner in Mexico.

So we stopped at a Super Walmart on the edge of town. Diapers were in the very far back corner, about 2 miles away, but I still was able to find them and get back to the registers within a few minutes. I should've been out in record time. But, no. There were about 85 registers in the place, but only 3 cashiers, even though the place was packed and several people were in each line, all with a shopping cart piled high. Hoping to save time, I opted for the self-checkout. The guy in front of me had problems and ended up having to get someone to cancel out his order so he could go through a cashier's line. I asked the girl manning the self-check out area if the machine would have change for a large bill and she said "Oh, definitely." I knew we didn't have any small bills and we needed some in case we got pulled over in Mexico - everyone knows you need to have a few 20's on hand just in case.

So I rang up the swim diapers and paid. The machine kicked out about 1/4 of my change and a notice came up that it needed to be refilled. The attendant called and said it would be a few minutes. I asked if she could give me change, but no - it had to come from that machine and there was only one person who could open it. TWENTY minutes later he showed up to refill the machine. Let's remember that Col and the baby are waiting in the car because I should've been in and out. What a nightmare.

Speaking of In-N-Out, that's where I wanted to grab dinner but Col was in the mood for Taco Bell. Col? In the mood for Taco Bell? I've never even heard him entertain the thought. So we ate Taco Bell. And it was gross. And so now, I will forever more associate Walmart and Taco Bell with misery. Misery, I tell you!

In my mind, they're still babies.

In reality, my niece is starting 2nd grade, and my nephew is 6 years old. Pictures of them always shock me because I expect them to be little and young and instead they look so grown up!

I'm loving that crushed pink velvet unitard. I want one.

Gonna miss that beard...

Col has been growing out his beard for his Halloween costume. It is now long enough that the baby can grab handfuls and yank. For some time, it has been understood that he will shave after Halloween. Last night, this understanding became a bit less understood as Col admired his beard in the mirror and said "Maybe I won't shave after Halloween."

Don't get me wrong, I like the beard. It is a great Paul Bunyan beard. I will miss the beard when it is gone. However, I know a day will come (probably around Nov. 1) when I will wake up and look at him and say "So... are you going to shave today?" and hopefully he won't say "I think I've decided to never shave again" because though I like the beard, I'm tired of it jabbing me in the face.

Viva la México!

I feel pretty.... oh so pretty...

This made me feel pretty. And though I know this defeats their whole message, it kind of made me want to have Shelly do this to every picture of me that is ever taken again.

New Shoes

Today at work we put back together one of our project rooms after extensive remodeling and construction. I had been standing for some time so I kicked off my shoes. The floor was quite dusty so I looked around for something to make shoes out of. My eyes fell upon something that you may be familiar with. It doesn't work very well to wrap a ream of paper in, but it makes great shoes.

P.S. I just realized how much my legs looked like the Grape Lady's legs in this picture, so I cropped them out. Be grateful, you lucky few who saw the previous picture.

Son of Grape Lady

You all remember the grape lady, right?

All hail the Drool Queen!

Bow to me ye minions!

Biscotti for Babies

Credit for this picture must be given once again to Master Photo Taker Tiffany. Addie would also like to thank Master Photo Taker Tiffany for introducing us to zwiebacks ("biscotti" if you can never remember the word "zwiebacks").

Oh, and I'd like to apologize to Master Photo Taker Tiffany for the state in which we left all of Audrey's blankets and bibs.

Sequins

They've outgrown baby toys, and are moving on to the finer things in life.

By the way, and this is for Capt. Monterey Jack, did you know you can find anything on Wikipedia?

Evidently I don't really follow geography, either.

Someone at work asked me about my weekend and then asked where the cabin was that we stayed at. Then the conversation went a little like this:

"Up past Payson."

"Oh really, where?"

"About 20 minutes north of Kohl's Ranch."

"Um.... do you mean east?"

"I don't know, we just drove through Payson and then took the 89 about another 30 minutes."

"Um... do you mean the 260?"

"..... Maybe."

Imagine funeral music playing softly in the background.

I'm not very good at zipping up my purse. Sometimes things fall out of it. Like my phone, right before Nate ran over it.

Scam City

When I first started at this job, I got a call stating we had ordered toner and they just needed to verify a model number and then they'd send it out. I assumed it had been ordered by the person I had replaced, so I gave them the model number. A few days later we received 2 toner cartridges and a bill for about $1,700 that stated I had ordered them. Come to find out, it was a big scam that you can read about here and here. (That last one calls me "unwitting". I was new!)

So anyway over the past month I've received about 20 phone calls from different people asking for the model number of our copier, and when I ask them what company they are with they hang up. Today was different. This is how the conversation went:

Guy: "I'm calling to update our records. What's the model number of your copy machine?"
Me: "I would ask what company you're with, but I know you'll just hang up."
Guy: "What are you talking about? I'm not going to hang up. I'm with Office Copiers, Inc."
Me: "Never heard of it."
Guy: "You've probably always talked to Tom Anderson."
Me: "Never heard of him."
Guy: "You're at (INSERT OUR ADDRESS HERE), right?"
Me: "You can find that in the Yellow Pages. Let me guess, you're going to send us toner and claim we ordered it and bill us for it."
Guy: "No. I'm just calling to update our records."
Me: "Well, you're not with the company we order toner from or the company that maintenances our copiers, so I'm not going to give you a model number."
Guy: "You probably usually talk to Mike."
Me: "Never heard of him."
Guy: "I could stop by later if that would be easier."
Me: "Even if you come here, I still won't give you any information."
Guy: "I can hold if you want to find someone to approve it."
Me: "I'm the one who would approve it. And I'm not going to."
Guy: "I'll hold all day if you want me to."
Me: "You can hold if you want, but I'm not going to give you any information."
Guy: "I'll just call back later." And then he hung up.

I don't really follow sports

and sometimes I make a fool out of myself because of it. Like this morning when someone at work said "So the tigers won last night" and I said "Yeah, I saw the end of that game. I guess the Suns had a 22 point lead at one point and still lost."

Pause. Everyone stares at me for a second.

And then someone says, "That's a pretty high scoring baseball game."

Office Wallpaper

I'm a fan of this The Office wallpaper. Unfortunately, I can't put one on my desktop background, because it makes it look like I'm online and we can't have that. However, if any of you are so inclined, feel free.

Project Runway

This is for anyone out there who likes this show and would like to see the lines presented by the designers at Olympus Fashion Week. It took me forever to find them.

Also, I would like to add that even a beautiful model can be caught looking really funny.

An exception to the rule.

Today I broke my "don't open anything until you pay for it" rule. This stuff must be applied AS SOON AS POSSIBLE when one feels a certain blemish coming on. As in "as soon as you find the box in the store" and not "as soon as you're able to pay for the medecine and leave the store."

Hand-puffed at the factory in Neucousin

Last night I was standing in the checkout line at the grocery store, patiently waiting my turn. The guy in front of me was buying 2 packages of mini marshmallows. The checker picked up the first bag, and little marshmallows spilled all over the place. She informed him that the package was open and asked if he wanted to get a different one. "Oh, I did that," he said. "Sorry, yeah... I opened it and ate some."

First of all, plain marshmallows are gross but if you are going to eat marshmallows without toasting them, I would think the large ones would be better, especially the colored ones. The small ones just taste like chalk. I personally prefer Fluffy Puff Air Puffed Sugar Delights.

Second, you're not supposed to go to the grocery store that hungry because then all you end up buying is mini marshmallows.

Third, you're not allowed to open stuff in a grocery store before paying for it unless it is to be fed to a screaming toddler. Bulk food bins are the exception, as long as you drop a nickel in the slot.

Troy, they're coming to you next.

This morning, 20 angry men wearing matching red "La Union Great Western" shirts came into our office and demanded to speak to one of the project managers. I informed them that he wasn't here, and their spokesman proceeded to explain the issues they have with some construction companies that we need to know about. I couldn't understand them very well - I speak about as much Spanish as their spokesman speaks English, but I didn't know how to say "We're not the ones you're looking for" in Spanish so I called up a coworker for help. She came up and explained to them that we don't hire construction companies directly. That is done by Builders such as Pulte, Richmond American, and T.W. Lewis.

They didn't leave right away, but they did leave. I was a little worried they were going to pull out picket signs and start marching right here in our lobby. This picture is of them headed to Pulte up the road. Good luck, Troy. I hope you speak Spanish.

Dear Diary

Col has made a discovery. The diary I kept from about age 10 - 13. He has found a wealth of entertainment and we both had a good laugh reading through it last night. So far, this is my favorite entry. It's interesting how history repeats itself, but the post script is what makes it truly classic. I left the spelling the way it was for dramatic and comedic effect.


March 30, 1991

The war in Iraq just ended! We won! I did my civic oration, came first in my class and fourth in the school contest! Gotta go!

Aub

P.S. Suddam Hussane’s a retard.

I always knew Tom Cruise was a Sith Lord.